When it comes to taking action and going outside of the comfort zone, there are many things that can go wrong. The most common one of them is you simply not succeeding. The expectation that everything will go wrong ultimately gives birth to fear that prevents us from even trying. Why bother when we know we won’t reach our goals, right?
In addition, there are a few other fears that are linked directly to taking on new challenges in life, such as the fear of judgment, fear of change and the fear of success. With the first two fears, it’s still quite clear what they are all about.
Fear of judgment usually happens when we want to do something different, but we are afraid that the people near won’t understand us, won’t accept our actions, and worst of all, will judge us if we fail. We assume that if we try, the “normal” us in the eyes of others will forever be erased. No longer will our family members and friends be able to take us seriously. From then on, we will always be the black sheep!
Ok, maybe the last statement is a bit too much, but you get my point. Besides, this is exactly how I felt when I first went speaking in front of a camera for my blog.
Fear of change is also nothing new. It’s simply the fear of doing things differently in life. This becomes a fear because we naturally don’t like changes. Now add to that the idea that you will have to work really hard to make that change happen, and it all becomes not worth it.
Finally, we come to the fear of success. Yes, although harder to grasp, fear of success is a real thing and we all experience at a certain stage of our self-development journey.
What is the fear of success?
Although I’ve been for long a big advocate of going outside of the comfort zone and working to make yourself a better person, it wasn’t until I was coaching one of my clients that I really came across this issue. After having analyzed this in another person, I realized that I too was a victim of the fear of success.
The reason why the fear of success is sometimes so hard to notice is because it is a lot more complicated than the fear of failure, fear of judgment or the fear of change. Unlike the other fears, we don’t experience or even think about this fear at the start of our transformation. It’s also very hard to predict at what stage this fear will emerge. It’s really sneaky, I kid you not.
Nevertheless, if you have stepped on the path of self-improvement, and have actively been working on making significant changes, there are a number of things to watch out for. You need to be especially alert if you begin to feel that there is a slight decline in your motivation, while procrastination is beginning to take over.
To put it in a nutshell, the fear of success arises when you begin to see momentum in whatever you are doing. Yes, I know, it’s that corny entrepreneurial word “momentum” again, but hear me out, it makes sense here. Whether you are trying to build a family, grow a business or move to another country, whenever you begin to make significant progress, and you realize that your dreams can be real, after all, fear of success creeps in. That is the moment when you get overwhelmed, say “hold on, we are going too fast here”, and you begin to slow yourself down.
Note, sometimes you slow yourself down intentionally, but sometimes it happens without you even realizing it, subconsciously.
The 5 signs
Below are the 5 signs that the fear of success may be holding you back. Go through them to be alert and aware. Don’t let it get on your way of living the life of your dreams.
Click To TweetFear of success may be the only thing holding you back, and you may not even know it.
1. Procrastination
The first sign of experiencing the fear of success may be about you procrastinating more frequently. This is especially true if procrastination wasn’t really ever your thing.
Procrastination as a consequence of this fear is actually something I experience every single time I begin to see improvements in my business. It’s as if things are too good to be true, and I want to keep them that way. I always feel like by moving forward, I will jinx the “luck” that has so far been on my side. I then slow down.
If you are anything like me, make sure to remind yourself that there is hardly any luck involved in your success. The fact that things are beginning to take off for you means that you have worked hard and you fully deserve what you are receiving.
To tackle procrastination, be sure to set daily, weekly and monthly goals. By you focusing on them rather than on the self-sabotaging thoughts, you ensure that you are not wasting any time.
Recommended book: Eat That Frog!: 21 Great Ways to Stop Procrastinating and Get More Done in Less Time
2. The sudden shift in goals
Another sign of the fear of success is the sudden change of goals.
For example, you have been very consistent with putting aside money in order to move to another country, but as soon as you have all of the money saved up, you suddenly realize that you want a brand new, expensive computer. In reality, though, you are afraid of moving away.
Shifting goals can sometimes be a very flexible and wise thing to do, but if you see that it hardly makes any sense, then you are most-likely running away from your success. To see the difference between the two, you need to carefully analyze your thoughts and to be very honest with yourself.
3. You begin to seek for perfection
Artists often struggle because of the endless desire to perfect their masterpieces. In the world of fears, you constantly trying to make something better may simply mean that you are once again putting off something that needs to be done next.
Perfection does not exist, at least not for the human mind. Something that looks amazing to me, may be completely dull to you. Therefore, don’t get stuck trying to make something infinitely better.
Click To TweetSometimes, moving forward is the only right thing to do.
4. You feel that others are better than you
This sign is somewhat opposite of the previous. Instead of seeing your work as something that is on the verge of perfection, you suddenly begin to dislike it. In fact, you completely devalue it. Despite having great results, you focus only on how much worse you are doing that everyone else. And everyone else, suddenly, seems to be doing much better than you.
Don’t allow these toxic thoughts to take over. Be aware of them. What you are doing deserves respect. Keep moving.
5. Manson’s Law of Avoidance
Finally, I wanted to add something from a book that I highly recommend: The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck.
In his book, Mark Manson refers to a law that he made up, the “Manson’s Law of Avoidance”. He explains that “The more something threatens your identity, the more you will avoid doing it. That means that the more something threatens to change how you view yourself, how you believe yourself to be, the more you will procrastinate ever getting around to doing it.”
I think this law really well falls into the category of what can happen when you begin to see momentum. It’s related to the fear of success, but also to the other fears. The mistakes you make, the judgment you take and ultimately, the success that you achieve, will all make you different, and therefore, will challenge your identity. All of these things will make you better, make you stronger and different. Don’t fear the change, but embrace it.
Thank you for stopping by and good luck!
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